Category Archives: lohan

the one where ‘liz & dick’ ruined my appetite.

ok “liz & dick.” i’m ready to be amazed. two seconds in and it looks like “lolita.” sunglasses and humbert humbert and all. ok what in the hell is this. what is this music. it’s like, “we’re going shopping for … Continue reading

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the one where lindsay lohan said something dumb and nobody was surprised.

this happened. WHY is everyone in SUCH a panic about hurricane (i’m calling it Sally)..? Stop projecting negativity! Think positive and pray for peace. — Lindsay Lohan (@lindsaylohan) October 29, 2012 really? “sally.” no problem, lindz. my positive energy usually … Continue reading

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the one where i remember that lindsay lohan is a thing.

once upon a time, there was this mess called lindsay lohan. and nobody liked her at all except for me. and she kept doing the dumbest things, and i didn’t even care, because she was lindsay and i was in … Continue reading

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the one where i just died from all the photoshop.

so lohan’s playboy spread (ha! geddit?) leaked to the universe, obviously. she probably leaked them herself. or maybe that dude did. anyway, it happened. and then i saw it. and it’s so NSFW, obviously, because it’s fucking playboy, so here … Continue reading

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the one where lindsay lohan is going to do what now?

i wasn’t going to comment on this, but HOW COULD I NOT. OMGWTFBBQ. PLAYBOY! she’s going to pose for playboy!!!!!! i wonder when it goes on sale? not that i want to see it, but you know i’m totally going … Continue reading

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the one where i live blog lindsay lohan’s court appearance.

just kidding. that’s not going to happen. but i am watching it live right now. and she looks so sad and little and tiny. and on the one hand i feel sorry for her, because i think she genuinely doesn’t … Continue reading

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the one where lindsay lohan can’t tell the difference between coke and quartz.

so this happened. some site i’ve never heard of before caught my girlfriend on video, buying drugs from some guy, in broad daylight, on a street corner. and then her publicist said that what she actually was buying was CRYSTALS. … Continue reading

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